You've all seen at least one episode of Sponge Bob, admit it! And chances are, this episode featured an appearance by everyone's favorite under-sea comestible, the Krabby Patty. Much like the Big Kahuna Burger, this sandwich basically boils down to a simple cheeseburger. The big difference, of course, is in the secret sauce. So secret is this sauce that only two people know its true recipe - Mr. Krabs and his mother. Whatever's contained in this sauce, I don't want it. Every patty you eat goes straight to your thighs, and then you blow up. And I thought Big Macs were bad for you.
The future sucks. Why? Because, if The Jetsons are to be believed, everything comes in pills. I hate taking pills. Come the future, even my meals will come in pill form. I don't know about you, but that seems like an awful way to live. At least give me the instant pizza from Back to the Futureor the powdered chicken from Fifth Element. Oh, and computers in the future suck too, apparently. Take a look at the one in this picture. It actually still uses punch cards. I guess we'll realize at some point in the near future that keyboards and touch screens are just too clunky and uncomfortable to use.
It's that Hawaiian Burger joint. Big Kahuna Burger sprouts up all over Quentin Taranto's universe, including movies like Death Proof, Four Rooms, From Dusk Till Dawn, Reservoir Dogs and of course Pulp Fiction. It also comes up in Sharkboy and Lavagirl, but we don't talk about that film. Anything that gives rise to Taylor Lautner's career is bad news. Supposedly, they make amazing burgers that everyone can enjoy. How do I know that? Samuel L. Jackson told me. Would you like to tell him he's wrong? Go right ahead. Make sure to leave me something in your will before you do, though.
Fittingly, a film about a candy factory had in it a lot of fictional candy. The Everlasting Gobstopper, the Willy Wonka Chocolate Bar, the Chocolate Golden Egg. Our favorite has got to be the Three-course-dinner Gum, though. A) Its promise is cool. A three-course meal in one stick of gum. Great for the road. B) It's not finished, and eating the prototype will turn you into a giant blueberry. Of course, this is the sort of fictional food that would be cool to have around but not to eat. Hell, I'm not eating a single damn thing that comes out of Wonka's Chocolate factory. The man's nuttier than a squirrel poo. He's the sort of guy they lock up in real life.
For once, the packaging doesn't lie. These Jelly Bean-looking things do, indeed, come in every flavor imaginable. You might get something fun like cinnamon or watermelon... or you might get ear wax, caca or some even more disgusting flavor. Jelly Belly tried to replicate this fictional food but unsuccessfully. They have many flavors, but I noticed the box said every flavor. False advertising, Jelly Belly!
In the end, I'm not entirely sure how I feel about Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans. On one hand, the promise of every flavor sounds pretty cool. On the other hand, they probably contain something that gives you cancer. Does the Ministry of Magic have a food and drug administration department?
In the end, I'm not entirely sure how I feel about Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans. On one hand, the promise of every flavor sounds pretty cool. On the other hand, they probably contain something that gives you cancer. Does the Ministry of Magic have a food and drug administration department?
Oh, Dragon Ball Z. Good stuff. Sure, many call it mindless, and even a good portion of anime nerds refuse to have anything to do with it, but the show still somehow managed to become huge. I certainly watched it religiously back when it was on Toonami. In the show, Senzu beans are grown by a cat named Korin (just go with it). Eating one is said to keep a human being full for ten days. These beans are much more than food, however. They have magical restorative properties that vary from situation to situation. They have restored characters back to perfect health from fatigue, impalement and blood loss. The effect is usually instantaneous and profound. Just be careful not to eat more than one at a time.
Also known as Bantha Milk, this is the stuff mommy Bantha produce to feed their young. Naturally, it doesn't take long for the Humans to get their hands on it. By the time A New Hoperolls around, Bantha milk is ubiquitous to every corner of the Galactic Empire. It is so common, in fact, that it inspired the phrase "Blue Milk Run," used most famously by Kyle Katarn to describe what looks like a really simple and basic assignment at the beginning of Jedi Outcast. Despite its mundanity, this drink is apparently very delicious and great at quenching thirst. Now this would make a great movie tie-in product!
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